“I heard it coming before I saw it: reports reached me of people blubbing in front of their televisions, so moved were they by this simple tale of a fictional boy counting the hours until he can give his parents a gift for Christmas. Given the fuss they were making, the tears they shed, you’d think they were watching footage of shoeless orphans being kicked face-first into a propeller. But no. They were looking at an advert for a shop… Anyone who cries at this creepy bullshit is literally sobbing IQ points out of their body. Is this really what we’ve become – a species that weeps at adverts for shops?”